The Peak of my Fucked Up Life

I have always been a fucked up person, in many many fucking ways, but no matter how fucked up I was before, nothing is comparable to the fucked-up-ness that just happened to fuck me real good, just a few hours ago; and hence the over dramatization of the post title. No shit.

It all began innocently at about 10 p.m. when Rei and I decided to call it a day and leave the studio so both of us could go home and get some rest - well; because I haven't been getting any sleep since the night before, and I needed to go home so that my Aunt could see my face before she start asking any advanced questions about what kind of drugs I have been using these days. I'm partially kidding, she's crazy like that. I bid Rei goodbye and headed towards my bus station, and about an hour of bus ride later, I sighed a relief as I got off the bus - finally, time to sleep. It's that crucial. Except for the sound of my own footsteps, and the occasional rustles of leaves, the 10 minutes walk home, was quiet, and cold. Calm even. I arrived at the front porch, greeted by bright motion-sensor spotlight, always happy to see me as I reach into my bag, and molested the interior. Silent.

The air seemed colder now. Silent. The missing sound of clinging keys.

Shit. Oh shit.

I left my house key in the studio.

My aunt and her family sleep early, and they wake up early, and that is probably why they think that what I do, always home late, skipping my sleep is almost like committing sin that demand confessing. They think I am weird as much as I think they are very very weird. Isn't that weird? Truth be told, I was afraid to get any of them up from their sleep to unlock the door for me. I hesitated. I called my cousin's name hoping that would wake him up but his snoring is louder than I'm willing to raise my voice and wake him up. We have neighbors, you know. After half an hour of hesitation, I decided to ring my aunt's cellphone. I couldn't have been happier, or luckier I should say, because she picked up the phone after a few rings. When I say I'm lucky, I really meant it. My battery went dead as soon as I heard her hello-ing into the phone. I knocked on the door, knowing she's awake. Nothing. So I hesitated again, and decided I'm not going knock anymore, because I just don't want to wake them up, that, and because I'm a wuss.

Plan B:

I'm just going to fucking walk to Takapuna and take a cab back to the city (it's 11:50pm by that time and the bus services has stopped-and it's Good Friday, so less bus services) and the only thing that I could do is to walk to Takapuna hopefully to ride on a cab back to studio. But its not easy. To walk to Takapuna from my house takes approx. 50 mins (I know because this is not the first time, the first time was I hailed a bus but the god damn driver did not notice me- it was 10 pm so I had to walk to Taka to get other busses to city), but anyway yeah, I though I've done it before so I'll do it again this time. But seriously I dont know if there's any cabs at Taka. So I walked and walked,when Im just few meters away from Taka, the rain start to pour. I thought fine, this is all fucked up so I'll just walk in the rain to get the situation more fucked.

Then when I finally reached Taka, God is really playin   either I wait there at Taka till the mornin comes or I called a cab. I have the cab number but, then again, i only have 2 twenty cents coins in my hand and whats shitty is that there is not payphones that have the coins slots. It's all cards, what's up with these people geez........

I walked and walked and walked, for almost another half an hour, a car stoped beside me, a cab. I told the driver that I need to go to Uni, right, when I reached uni, the driver tryin to rip me off by asking me to pay 40 bucks. I literally asked him to fuck off and I payed him the usual amount to or from north shore which is 26NZD. I reached studio exactly 2 in the morning. See i spent almost 2 hours wondering in Takapuna in my teeshite and it's wet. Can you imagine how cold I am.

See how fucked up it is? I was gonna go home to get some sleep and I ended up in studio not getting any sleep now. It's 5 in the morning! and its the third day that I haven been sleeping.

This proves many things, one is how fucked up my life is. Second, how wussy I am when I'm back to my aunt's house, 3rd is that I am a fucked up person and I believe I will always be fucked up in the future. and the fourth point, though not related, is that please that small eyed korean-abo-look-alike chick go to hell.

Oh dear, I guess I'll go to sleep now. On the carpet.

Studio's my only shelter!