KARMA IS A FUCKING BITCH

I feel like I have been stalked.

Tonight, while I was at a friend's birthday dinner, someone decided to send me some anonymous text messages, and the content of it went pretty ugly, which at some point in the text exchange it involved some mother-fucking and father-fucking, and I find myself seriously bugged by this mysterious textathone the entire night.

First of all I hated it when people send me random messages and not disclosing themselves. I am not saying I get these messages all the time, in fact it had only happened once a year or something like that and I usually get over it pretty quickly. The thing about it is that it's actually quite scary when that person that sent you those random messages sort of know a little about you and they make damn sure in the text that you know they know you so that it lingers and fucks with your mind a little. It's like someone who has been so horny but hasn't got laid like in a million years decided to get off by mind-fucking you, and then cum all over your brain. It's weird and it's my problem too because I love to mind fuck people too, which then you could probably tell how much fun I have been having with my hand lately and karma has this sort of crazy way of getting back at me.

But then that's the thing with people, they never get confrontational. No one really ever go 'Hey you know what? I really hate you and your silly humongous ass and you know what I have been hating you all these years, there you have it' although I find that most people love phrasing 'If you've got something to say about me, you better say it right here in my face' without having to realize that the truth actually shrinks their balls. What most people would do is that they sneak behind your back and throw a big bitch-fest for you, and haven't we all done that ? oh, it was so much fun. Not that I enjoy confronting people, mind you. All I am saying is that I hated it when people starts going all psychological bullshit with me and fucking with my thoughts, I hated it when I couldn't find a solution to an answer, ultimately I hated it when something happened, I didn't know how it started or why it happened. It's like the kind of feeling you get in one of those pre-diarrhea moments when you feel like you need to shit real bad but it's just not quite there yet but it's getting there, but not quite. It fucking sucks.

I'm used to it though, it's just that it sucks to have let something like this ruined my entire night out and it sucks that I couldn't help myself to drop it and move on because every single thing people said about me bugs me. I wish I was one of those that doesn't give a fuck about what you said. I do, and I care a lot and that is why I am mentally fucked because imagine if 4 person said something bad about me in one day, my brain would've need to process 4 different incidents, 4 different things, sometimes when it's related, I just need to put it together to make sense but it's a lot of work to do. Like once in a while, people would come to me and say some really disparaging things about me, or my family or friends. Sometimes it ended pretty, sometimes it's sticky, and most of the time, I'll get over it. It's just how relationship works isn't it? While your having a wonderful relationship here, you are fucking up another relationship there at the same time.

Ah, how I hate dealing with all these mess.


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